What is grief?

Grief is a natural response to the loss of someone or something very important to you. The loss may cause sadness and may cause you to think of very little else besides the loss. The words sorrow and heartache are often used to describe feelings of grief.

Grieving is the process of emotional and life adjustment you go through after a loss. Grieving after a loved one's death is also known as bereavement.

Grieving is a personal experience. Depending on who you are and the nature of your loss, your process of grieving will be different from another person's experience. There is no "normal and expected" period of time for grieving.

You may experience physical, emotional, social, or spiritual expressions of grief. While you are feeling shock, numbness, sadness, anger, guilt, anxiety, or fear, you may also find moments of relief, peace, or happiness.

Grieving can cause problems such as headaches, loss of appetite, or trouble with thinking or sleeping. You may withdraw from friends and family or behave in ways that are unusual for you. Grief may cause you to question your beliefs or views about life.

Grief itself is a natural response that doesn't require medical treatment. Social support and good self-care may help. But if you find that your grief is making it difficult to function, contact a grief counselor, bereavement support group, or your doctor.

If you have symptoms of depression, prolonged anxiety, or post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD), call your doctor.

Getting help for suicidal thoughts

Where to get help 24 hours a day, 7 days a week

If you or someone you know talks about suicide, self-harm, a mental health crisis, a substance use crisis, or any other kind of emotional distress, get help right away. You can:

• Call the Suicide and Crisis Lifeline at 988.
• Call 1-800-273-TALK (1-800-273-8255).
• Text HOME to 741741 to access the Crisis Text Line.

Consider saving these numbers in your phone.

Go to 988lifeline.org for more information or to chat online.

When you're grieving, give yourself all the time you need to identify, accept, and express your emotions.

Identify your feelings.

You may have conflicting feelings, such as sadness and relief. Writing is one way to identify what you're feeling.

Accept your feelings.

Try to stay connected to people around you. If you're having trouble talking about your feelings, consider joining a bereavement (grief) support group.

Be patient and kind to yourself.

Your feelings may be unpredictable and uncomfortable. Remind yourself that your feelings are normal.

Express your emotions.

Expressing how you feel may help when you're grieving.

If you're afraid that you might harm yourself or someone if you express your emotions, talk with someone you trust or your doctor or a counselor about your concerns. You can ask your doctor for a referral. Or you might contact the National Alliance on Mental Illness (NAMI). You can text 741741 for 24/7 free support from a trained counselor. You can also call the NAMI HelpLine (1-800-950-6264) or go online (www.nami.org/help) to chat with a trained volunteer.

Seek support.

Support might be friends and family, doing activities you enjoy, or finding ways to express your feelings, such as keeping a journal.